Another great read Michelle; this line, in particular, stood out for me: I lived with pain, guilt, and shame for years following my first sexual encounter due to standards that someone else had put on me, not on standards I had decided for myself.

Celibacy is a very big decision, and I hope more parents realize that forcing that decision (especially at such a young age) is not the way to go. When it’s not your own decision it usually doesn’t pay off, even if you do manage to abstain until marriage. Even though my parents were in clergy, they made it clear that what I did was my decision. They didn’t approve of pre-maritals, they didn’t support it, they let me know exactly how they felt about it. And I was, for the most part, supervised in relationships. But it was never a matter of “you do this because we say so”. If you haven’t already, there’s a book called “Pure” in which the author goes in-depth about the evangelical movement of the 90s and how young women such as herself were brought up with the idea that their value as a person is attached to their virginity. It’s an excellent read. Thanks for sharing!